Here I Am!

Thanks to everyone who has been checking on me. I'm here - just busy! John was out of town for almost a week and we are busily preparing to move Kailey upstairs and get ready for Levi. On top of that, I decided my house wasn't organized enough so we've gotten rid of boxes of things and organized and decluttered away. I'm also doing overhaul on the gameroom and finally getting some shelving built for better toy/school/art storage. I guess it's just kind of that point when you've settled into a house enough to realize what needs to be changed from the way you first arranged it. In April and May we have lots of plans including a trip, John and I both will be attendants for two dear friends' wedding, which of course brings a shower, bachelor and bachelorette parties over here, we also have John V's birthday, and all the usual hooplah. Needless to say, I may not do much better with my blogging anytime soon! Anyway, I have pictures and updates and will get to those as soon as I can.

I'm Dreaming of a White Easter?!

If you live around here, you can see that the snow is coming down! When Kailey woke up from her nap we bundled up and took our little snowbunny selves outside for some playing in the snow! Even Noel (our dog) joined us and went a little crazy, not understanding all the white stuff. I think she also didn't recognize Kailey and kept sniffing her to see what she was. : ) The lighting isn't very good in these pictures but they get the point across.

So pretty!

Little snow bunny - she couldn't move!

Little snow dude

Baby snowman! Mommy's not talented enough for the big kind and Noel ate my first one.

Uh, Mom? Shouldn't this be a little bigger?!

The Three Boys

John V has quickly overcome all of his initial disappointment and is now announcing to the world that he has a new brother, Levi, on the way. The way he says his brother's name is adorable! Last night they wanted a picture of the three boys taken together. I can't tell you how special these wonderful "men" are to me! My sweet husband is such a terrific boy dad, a godly example of masculinity and emotion, brains and spirituality, tenderness and strength. I am so excited for Levi to have this dad and brother!

"Kissing baby brother"

This is Levi!

It's a . . .

BOY!!! We are beyond thrilled! He is healthy and seems to have the correct number of everything. Praise the Lord for His gracious gift! Our sweet one's name will be Levi Joshua. Levi means "unified" and we pray that he will feel a special and important part of our family unit as the second son and a child so closely following Kailey in age. So often the third child brings such a special spirit that is able to read people and the greatest of hearts. We will eagerly look forward to seeing all that is completely unique about our son. Joshua, of course, comes from our experience in December and the verses in the Bible that God gave to us in our scary moments. Joshua means "God saves." Just writing that gives me chills. He does. Whether spiritually or physically, He is constantly saving us when we are completely helpless to do anything for ourselves. I keep saying his sweet name over and over, so excited to be able to address my son! There will be special prayers in our home tonight as we pray over our children!

John V seemed very disappointed at first that it was not two babies. Even the sonogram technician felt bad for him as he was saying, "But we need a LOT of kids!" (That is not something that we have said to him, by the way.) I reminded him that God brings them one at a time (usually) in His timing, and that we would just keep the desire of John's heart in front of God's throne. I have full confidence that God has given him that precious spirit because he will be the oldest of several and it completely amazes me to see the preparation God will do in my children for His plans. I don't even have to take care of it! What a precious Lord. By the time we finished our celebratory lunch with the grandparents (and two aunts), John had lost his disappointment and was telling everyone it was going to be a brother "just like him." Kailey has absolutely no idea what is happening. : ) We cannot wait to see yet another precious sibling relationship develop in front of our eyes.

It means so much to me for all of you to have shared in my excitement over this day. The only thing as fun as a momentous day in your life is having loved ones to share it with! I love you all!

Spiritual Preparations

This morning I am feeling a little introspective. I woke up feeling excited and then just began on a little "remembering" walk with the Lord as I began to pray about the sonogram. Due to my family's (and other's) recent histories, I have learned to never take for granted what will happen during the course of a pregnancy. Learned that while there is no reason to fear, I have no "right" to a healthy baby and certainly "deserve" it no more than all the thousands who experience losses and difficulties. It has been amazing that even in having a deeper and more personal realization of all that can happen, I can still have more excitement and hope than ever before. Somewhere on this crazy road of bearing children there was a change. I started out driving the car and asking the Lord to navigate and tell me the best way to go. When traveling that way there is some pride upon reaching a destination, some personal responsibility when goals are reached, even when we are taking credit for what we have absolutely no control over. But somewhere in this pain and joy, the longing and waiting and the speed, the answers and the remaining questions, we did a Chinese fire drill. I think it was a gradual process. If you've ever changed drivers without getting out of the car, you know the tangle of arms and legs around the steering wheel as you try to switch seats. I think that may be what it has looked like. But as I prayed this morning, I realized that I have absolutely no desire to drive. I even have less and less of a pull to grab at the steering wheel when something scary seems imminent. More and more, when an obstacle shows up in the road, I just want to grab at His arm, just hold on to make sure He's taking care of it. This change has come at a dear price, but there is no value that can be put on peace and trust. How many children we have and when, their health, their futures, their genders, their timing - all of this is not mine and it never was. I only ask to sit and ride and to enjoy this journey. He's the only One who can truly keep in mind where we're ultimately headed anyway - we always seem to be on personal detours. I am so thrilled and can hardly wait until 11:30 when we no longer have to wonder who this little person is! I am so grateful that whoever he or she is, whatever happens in his or her life, I don't have to have all the answers. I can just point at the One driving and say, "Blessed be the Name of the Lord."